I Want To Inspire

At first, I didn’t know if I wanted to write what its like to have Aspergers and share my experiences living with it or if I wanted to take one of the millions of ideas that have been floating around in my head and write a full length fiction novel, but I thought that maybe writing about my life experiences in my blog would be a lot easier then spending months maybe even years writing a book that may not even get published. My blog could be my book and anyone from anywhere in the world can access it at any time. Who knows, my blog entries could eventually turn into a book, if it falls into the right hands. Until that happens, lets write about Aspergers and see where it takes me. This could my way of escaping and let out all the things that race thru my mind. Just a way for me to let everything out.

I came up with the idea of writing my memoirs about having Aspergers because I always wanted to inspire people and wanting to make a difference, but I was hesitant to write this because I didn't want to give too much information about myself. I didn’t want to tell to much. I didn’t want the world to know every little detail about me, but then I thought about it and realized that I’m in charge of what I say and how I say it. I’m in charge of making sure that what I say comes off as inspiring and not as something that comes off as a someone who’s looking for sympathy. If I don’t want you to know something or if there’s a memory that I don’t want to share then I don’t have to talk about it. I can choose what you read and what you should know about me. All I want from this is to have people relate to me and know that their not the only one going thru whatever their going thru.

I’m not ashamed of having Aspergers, but there have been times where I wish it didn’t exist. People may be curious about why I am the way I am and they should ask questions. There have been been situations where Aspergers makes an appearance and no matter how hard I try to hide it, it shows up unannounced and uninvited.

It's part of who I am and if I was like every one else then I wouldn’t be me. I’m one of a kind. There isn’t anyone out there who is as unique as I am.

In the end, I just want to be able to be myself and hope that I can inspire at least one person. It’s my way of paying it forward. If one person learns anything from this, then maybe they can do the same for someone else and so and so forth.

I hope you can come along this journey. We can learn how to deal with Aspergers together. Not every story is the same, but I hope it will help you look at the world in a different way, through someone else’s eyes. All I can really do is hope that someone will be inspired to do good in the world.

I was 23 years old when I was officially diagnosed with Aspergers, but I felt like it didn’t change anything. Aspergers was a word that finally explained why I am the way I am. Its just a small part of me. There’s so much more of me that is waiting to be discovered.

I’ve never hidden the fact that I have Aspergers. It was something that I just don’t bring up unless I knew that it would either help me or if I knew that whoever I’m telling is going to be around for a while. I don’t want someone who’ve I’ve met one time to randomly know I have it. I don’t want people to look at me and only see Aspergers. I want people to look at me as a person and for who I am and not for someone who’s brain is wired differently.

I always thought that having Asperger’s wasn’t that big of a deal. It seems like everyone else wants to make it a bigger deal then it actually is. People tell me that I haven’t accepted the diagnosis. That I am in denial about having it. If you were diabetic, would you go around telling people you are diabetic? No, you wouldn’t. It’s more of a need to know basis. If a situation came up where addressing it would be beneficial then I’ll casually bring it up. I’m not going to tell people within the first 5 minutes of meeting them especially if I’m never going to talk to them again. I’m not going to announce it all over the world. Until now.