What Is Self Determination?

Self-determination refers to the ability or power of a person or group to make their own decisions and choices, especially regarding their own future and governance, without external coercion or control. 

Being able to be self-determine, you have to be able to choose what you want and need for yourself, being able to not feel influenced by other people in making your own decisions and to be the driver of your life and not be the passenger.  Being able to control your life and have the life you deserve.

You have the right to choose to do what you want to do in life, but there will come a time, especially if we are very unwell and unable to make decisions for ourselves, we have to allow someone else to take the wheel and be able to make the right choices for you so your back to a healthy state where your back in the driver’s seat.

When it comes to mental health and addiction, we can’t be the one that tells someone what they need to do to help themselves, they need to be able to make that choice for themselves. They don’t need be told how to live when it was their decision to begin with that got them on the road of addiction. They got themselves into that type of situation and they have to make that decision to get off that road and back to who they were before addiction.

As much as we would want to help someone with their addiction, we need to step back and let the person deal with it in their own way. The more we interfere, the less motivation they’re going to have to get better.

Not all people with addiction are bad people. They were in a situation where getting addicted to something was out of their hands. When you are prescribe pain medication, not everyone is going to be addicted to them. A lot of the time, we know when to stop taking the meds, other people want to take more than they should, it’s not something they had planned. If they weren’t prescribe the medication, they wouldn’t have had an addiction because they don’t crave it.

People will “try” and do something harder than pain meds because they were influenced by someone to try. They had every right to walk away. They had that chose, but they decided in that moment to go down that road. They allowed someone to make that choice for them.

The little things in life can be hard for someone. As a friend, being able to celebrate the little things can be big. It can be encouraging. Every little step towards something bigger is still a step forward.

You don’t want to patronize someone. It shows someone that you are superior or more knowledgeable. It will make the person feel disrespected and belittled.

Patronizing Behaviours Include:

• Refusing to take someone’s feelings seriously

• Treating someone like a child

• Interrupting someone and finishing their sentences

• Dismissing someone’s opinion without consideration

• Talking in a condescending tone

These can cause tension in a relationship, even make people have a falling out because they don’t feel like their being taken seriously. As much as we love someone and want what is best for them, we are our own individual person. We don’t need to have someone tell us what we should and shouldn’t do.

We need to be able to stand up for ourselves and let people know that this is how it is. We don’t need to told what the best way to live life. We will live and learn, we fail, and we succeed. Take back the life you want.