My Own Worst Critic

Every year I always tell myself that I’m going to do a bunch of things throughout the year, but I always get discouraged and I always think about how its never going to turn out the way I think its going to and I never end up doing said things. I always think about the end result long before I even start whatever idea I have in my head. I always worked hard at whatever I did, but when I feel like I don’t get recognized or feedback, I start to doubt myself and I give up because I think that if someone doesn’t care then why should I.

I know it seems like I’m being hard on myself. I’ve written about it a few times before where I feel like I’m being left in the background when everyone else is living life and enjoy it to the fullest. I feel invisible when it comes to trying to make something of myself. I have dreams and goals and I keep telling myself that I’m going to make them come true, but more often then not, I become less confident in myself about what I can do and it makes me less motivate in achieving what I want for myself. I want so much in life and when I see other people become successful and doing things that I want to do, it makes me feel like I don’t have what it takes it takes to get to where they are. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. People always say its who you know or you just have to go out and network, connect with people and you’ll be where you want to be in no time, but when your not a people person and having a hard to meeting people as it is, networking and connecting with people is challenging. I always did things in my own way.

I always wanted to start from the bottom and worked my way up. I always wanted to be able to look back and say that this is where it all started and I wouldn’t have changed it for the world. Life is tough and its never going to go the way you want it to. Some people have the skills to move mountains and others need an entire village just to move a bolder. I want to be the person who inspired you to reach for the stars and to go after what you want. I got to find whatever is in me to make the life I want even if it means working my butt off to succeed and to make everything work in my favor. I just have to dream a little bigger and don’t take things to seriously. My time will come.