Fear Holding Me Back

I do have to admit that I let fear hold me back. I let fear take control. When I have doubts about something, I convince its fear telling me that I shouldn’t do it even when I know that I should at least try before I walk away. Anxiety plays a part in it too. Sometimes I think they go hand in hand in some situations. If I’m talking myself out of something, I think fear is there to convince that its a scary thing and then the anxiety tells me a whole bunch of things that I know aren't true, but I start to believe whatever it tells me then it makes me not want to do something before I even leave the house.

I’ve always wanted to just let go of the fear and just follow my heart and do the things I’ve always wanted to do, but anxiety creates scenarios on why I shouldn’t do it. There have been times where I know I want to do something and I’ll do everything in my power to do it, but then I start thinking about the consequences like what if it doesn’t work out, what if I don’t get the recognition or what is I spend weeks, maybe months on something and nobody pays attention to the hard work I put into whatever I’m working on, but in the back of my mind, I know its something that I want and I shouldn’t let what other people think be the reason I shouldn’t do something.

Fear is something that everyone has. You start thinking about it and you let it stop you from doing what really means a lot to you. Take my writing for an example; I fear that I will never be able to do it for a living. I believe that no matter how much time and affect I put into it, nobody’s going to take it seriously and I won’t be able to do the one thing I’m passionate about. Writing is everything and I feel like fear is standing between me and my writing and because of it, nobody is able to listen/read what I have to say. I feel like I’m talking to nobody. My words go out in the world then disappear before it has a chance to be seen. Maybe I think to much about something and I blame fear in thinking it's the one convincing me that I can’t do things. I should really just go for it and step outside the box. What’s the worst that ca happen? I think I’m not good enough and it starts to get to me which brings out the worst in myself. I’m my own worst critic.