Why Do People Need Validation

When someone wants validation, it means that they are looking for reassurance, recognition, or acceptance of their feelings, actions, or worth, often rooted in a natural desire for connection or a need to soothe insecurity. It's a way for them to be seen and heard. They want people to know they exist.

Posting on social media about their everyday life and wanting likes and comments from people they may not know makes them feel less lonely since they feel like those people are their friends. It motivates them to fill the empty space that is lacking in their personal life. They want people to know that they are having a fulfilling life when in reality they are struggling with loneliness and possibly boredom. They need to be reassured that they are living a meaningful life even if they don’t have true meaning behind it. It brings them peace of mind that people are giving them the ‘encouragement’ to keep posting. They need to find their self worth from someone else.

They want to know what other people think about them, they want people to give them their opinion about what’s going on in their life, they want to be valued and have that feeling of accomplishment that they are doing something right by the world. By posting on social media about every little thing that goes on in their life makes them want to be accepted because if they don’t prove that something happened, it never really happened.

Sometimes people want to post about their success and their achievements. They want to show everyone the hard work they’ve put in to be able to afford the ‘good’ things in life, but are they really that happy? They are validating because it's an ego boost. They need to prove to everyone that they achieve anything if they work for it, but what did it take to get to where they are? They are only showing that people want to see and not what it takes to get to that level of success. 

The people we see online are not always the people we see in real life. We hide behind our phones and computers and create these ‘characters.’ We can say and do whatever we want online, but would we actually see and do those things in real life? People create these false identities and sometimes they can’t get away from the person they’ve created. You start to lose yourself and forget who you are all because you feel like you can’t make decisions without someone validating you. You need that constant approval from the people around you.

People need constant reassurance that they are doing something right. They are insecure. They want a sense of belonging. They rely entirely on others to determine personal value, which can stem from deep-seated shame or a weak sense of self-identity. 

It becomes a competition on how many likes and comments a post can get and when a certain number doesn’t get reached, they will keep posting until they reach what they think is a viral post. It's like an addiction. They need to keep going back more even when they know it's doing more harm than good.